Movie Fest V: Oh god help me....

Just got a new film from ScreenSelect.

Timeline.

A group of archeology students somehow end up back in medieval France. Get into trouble. Get back to the US. That's the plot. The trailer looked OK.

The trailer missed the plot holes...

Where shall I begin?

Rule #1 of time travel: Don't take anything back into the past from the modern era.
So why did the two goons, sent back with the archie-types by the corporation that discovered time travel, have grenades on them??



Rule #2 of time travel: The gadgets they use to come back to the modern era need 40 feet of clearance to operate.
So why did the first of those two goons, after being shot by bow and arrow twice (just like Boromir in Lord of the Rings, but with less class), pull his grenade pin, trigger the gadget, and travel back to the modern era WITHOUT LETTING GO OF THE GRENADE, thus destroying the travellers' route back home (and adding the necessary suspense to this sorry tale), in the middle of a french wood, and with men on horseback nearby.



Rule #1 of film making: Don't pick on the obvious suspect without good reason.
6 people from modern-day US. 5 american, one french or canadian. All get captured by the English baron who is currently encamped in medieval france. One speaks up for his team, in American English. The afore-mentioned baron suddenly asks the guy next to him what his name is, and lo and behold, it's the french guy. Francois.

Cue: one dead french spy.

But why stop at him? Why not ask the next four people what their names are? I'm sure they were Double Entendre, Je Ne Sais Quoi, Croissant, and Avant Garde.

(If you've not seen Top Secret, then A. you've no idea what I'm talking about, and B. you need to get a life!)



Rule #2 of film-making: Don't invent paradoxes if you're doing time travel.
A girl in modern times wonders why a medieval fresco has been demolished. That same girl goes back to medieval times and wonders why someone would demolish that fresco. Of course, it was her! So she demolishes it, and the wall collapses to reveal a hidden tunnel. Which she wouldn't have found if the modern girl hadn't noticed the damage. Which wouldn't have happened if the she'd not damaged it. Which wouldn't have happened if the modern girl hadn't noticed....

...

... sorry.


Anyone notice the flaw here?



Rule #1 of archeology: Learn some of the language that you're digging up.
"Il est mon pere". It's not difficult. I learned that much in 2 years at school, and you're doing doctorates in medieval french history! Get a grip! Those four words would have saved a lot of bother and several lives....



Thank god I also got "I, Robot" today as well. At least I know that was a good film!

posted by Blakey UK @ 9:18 pm